Drafto with Bella

At age seven, my daughter Bella (“future girl Iron-Man”) is already a strategic genius. I know most parents generally overrate their children, but I came to this conclusion today after being lectured as to why she whooped me in chess (as a seven-year-old she pronounced her opening “The Italy-an Game” and criticized my early game bishop v. pawn sequencing. I was the president of my high school chess club.

“Legend” sections borrow liberally from each characters’ Wikipedia entries, with some obvious cropping and commentary by YT.

Daddy: Okay let’s draft great fighters. Do you want to go first or second?

Bella: You can go first.

Daddy: You sure?

Bella: Sure.

Daddy: I take Bruce Wayne.

Bella: Lady Shiva and Captain America.

Daddy: Wow, great picks! I guess I’ll take Iron Fist and… Karate Kid.

Bella: Okay. Super Boy Prime and Anti-Monitor!

Daddy: We’re done.

Bella: What do you mean?

Daddy: I mean we’re done. There is no indication either or those characters is even good at fighting!

Bella: You don’t really have to be that good at “fighting” if you can burn a planet down just by looking at it.

Legend:

Superboy-Prime
Superboy-Prime has all the basic abilities of a Kryptonian except at a much higher level, exposed to yellow sunlight: superhuman strength, speed, senses, agility, healing, endurance, superbreath, flight, x-ray vision, heat vision, and invulnerability. His power is close to that of the Silver Age “Earth-One” Superman’s, which makes him one of the most powerful characters in the universe. Superboy-Prime’s future self has complete control over time itself.

At the end of Infinite Crisis, it took the Supermans of two universes flying Superboy-Prime through a red sun to stop him. This defeat cost the life of the elder Superman as well as 32 Green Lanterns, where one copy of the Green Lantern ring is “the most powerful weapon in the universe”.

Anti-Monitor
Anti-Monitor was one of the most formidable foes ever faced by the heroes of the DC Universe (or “Multiverse”, as it was then and now). He is directly responsible for more deaths than any other known DC supervillain, having destroyed nearly all of an infinite number of universes.

… May not be as tough as Superboy-Prime.

(different draft)

Daddy: Okay we’re going to draft super scientists (which is something I think you will be more respectful of).

Bella: Okay.

Daddy: Ground rules — and even if someone can say grow or stretch (no hints here) no giants. No celestial beings.

Bella: So they at least started off at regular size?

Daddy: Sure. Okay do you want first pick or second pick?

Bella: Not sure.

Daddy: You’re trying to game me. I know you want Azmuth first but last time you took first pick Azmuth I took Valeria.

Bella: I want Valeria.

Daddy: I am not taking Valeria first pick.

Bella: I’ll take first pick.

Daddy: Do you want Valeria?

Bella: Yes.

Daddy: Okay, you can have Valeria. Go ahead.

Bella: Promise?

Daddy: I said so, didn’t I?

Bella: Okay… Azmuth.

Daddy: What!?! Well played.

Bella: For a seven-year-old. I assume because I am seven and you don’t want to set me up for a lifetime of not trusting men, you won’t go back on your word and take Valeria just because I tricked you and took Azmuth anyway *.

Daddy: Well, Valeria is only three, so you’re not that smart. I guess I’ll take Reed Richards and Brainiac Five.

Bella: Valeria Richards — or should I say VALERIA VON DOOM — and Victor Von Doom.

Daddy: I will wheel Lex Luthor and the SCIENTIST SUPREME Hank Pym.

Bella: Five man teams?

Daddy: Yeah. This is your last pick.

Bella: Iron Man and Nathaniel Richards.

Daddy: Remember the time you had all the Richards?

Bella: Make your last pick.

Daddy: I take Amadeus Cho.

Who do you think won the draft of the super scientists? Answer in the comments below!

Team MichaelJ:

• Reed Richards
• Brainiac Five
• Lex Luthor
• Henry Pym
• Amadeus Cho

Team Bella:

• Azmuth of Galvan
• Valeria Richards
• Victor Von Doom
• Anthony Stark
• Nathaniel Richards

Legend:

Azmuth
(Ben 10 Universe) Creator of the three greatest scientific achievements of the Ben 10 universe, including both the greatest weapon and the greatest instrument of peace. Called the smartest being in [his] universe, Azmuth disagrees, saying he is merely the smartest being in three, arguably five, galaxies.

Reed Richards
(Marvel Universe) Generally depicted as the most intelligent being in the Marvel universe.

Brainiac 5
(DC Universe, 31st Century) Brainiac 5 possesses a Twelfth Level Intellect, which grants him superhuman calculation skills, amazing memory and exceptional technical knowledge. By comparison, 20th century Earth as a whole constitutes a Sixth Level Intellect, and most of his fellow Coluans have an Eighth Level Intellect. 31st century Earth as a whole is a Ninth Level Intellect. His incredible memory allows him to retain knowledge of events that all other characters forget[.]

Valeria Richards
(Marvel Universe) Daughter to Reed and Sue Richards. At age three, Valeria claims to be her father’s intellectual superior. [whether or not this is true you can probably see why a seven-year-old girl would want to draft her high]

Victor Von Doom
(Marvel Universe) Doctor Doom is a polymath scientific genius. Throughout most of his publication history, he has been depicted as one of the most intelligent humans in the Marvel Universe — comparable to arch rival Reed Richards.

Lex Luthor
(DC Universe) The most intelligent human in the DC Universe, and as one of the most intelligent beings of any planet or species. He has mastered seemingly every known form of science, and considers Brainiac his only intellectual rival.

Henry Pym
(Marvel Universe) Scientist Supreme of the Marvel Universe (basically the opposite number to deus ex machina Dr. Strange).

Anthony Stark
(Marvel Universe) Inventive genius whose expertise in the fields of mathematics, physics, chemistry, and computer science almost rivals that of Reed Richards, Hank Pym, and Bruce Banner, and his expertise in electrical engineering and mechanical engineering surpasses even theirs. He is regarded as one of the most intelligent characters in the Marvel Universe. Also Bella’s hero and the reason she (too) wants to attend MIT.

Nathaniel Richards
(Marvel Universe) Time traveler, scientific genius; father to Reed Richards and grandfather to Valeria Richards (also in this list).

Amadeus Cho
(Marvel Universe) Rated 7th smartest person in the world by Reed Richards, eighth by Hank Pym, and 10th by Bruce Banner. Likely smarter than Athena, Greek goddess of wisdom. Regardless, a brilliant teenager.

So…

Who won?

LOVE
MIKE

* Okay, the (emphasized) second part of that only took place in my head. But you can see where either of us was going on this 🙂